Daily History Facts – Cossacks reply to the Sultan
In 17th century, Ottoman Sultan Mehmed IV sent a letter demanding the full surrender of Zaporozhian Cossacks. Cossacks did not like this. Led by Ivan Sirko, they decided to send back a nasty letter.
There is a painting that depicts the moment Cossacks replied to the Ottoman Sultan called “Zaporozhian Cossacks”. One of the finest words in the letter was “Fuck thy mother”
Here is the full letter
“Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!
O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil’s kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou shalt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons; we have no fear of your army, by land and by sea we will battle with thee, fuck thy mother.
Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig’s snout, mare’s arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow, screw thine own mother!
So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won’t even be herding pigs for the Christians. Now we’ll conclude, for we don’t know the date and don’t own a calendar; the moon’s in the sky, the year with the Lord, the day’s the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!”
Here is another a inspiring bad ass story of how these women pirates ruled the high seas.